Inaugural Celebrity Hottie Top Ten

As promised, here is the first Hottie Top Ten to be published. Nothing is set in stone, and things can change very suddenly. The ranking is determined very scientifically based on variables such has, "Q rating " (I don't really know what that means), Number of Leaked Homemade Sex Tapes on the Internet to extend a flagging career (yep, you guessed it, the more tapes the lower the rating!), and many factors that I can't begin to get into because it would be so mind boggling that you would all be rendered helpless mental infants.

So without further delay (reasons for the top 5, after that just the names, like I said, I'm lazy) :

1. Jessica Alba
- C'mon, have you seen Sin City? Hell this is the woman that was able to encourage me to watch "Flipper" on YTV back in 1995, enough said.

2. Natlie Portman
- This is probably going to cause a lot of dissention, but hear me out. Ignore the Star Wars fiascos, forget Beautiful Girls, and just watch Closer. Trust me your opinion will change. Its all about the face.

3. Katie Holmes
- Has fallen off a bit since Dawson's Creek was cancelled, but with Batman Begins coming out on June 17 (mark it down, people) Katie will be making a monumental comeback (if comebacks for people still in their 20's is an appropriate term).

4. Angelina Jolie
- Total MILF here. A little old, but hey everyone just has to respect the hottness. Besides, things probably won't be heading south for her for at least another couple of years.

5. Jessica Simpson
- A little overexposed, and is anyone else excited that Newlyweds is being cancelled? Still, a lot of good "qualities", and I have a feeling she is gonna look pretty good as Daisy Duke. (Damn you Nick Lachey, floor seats to March Maddness and Jessica).

6. Rachel Bilson (mmm, rage blackouts)

7. Eliza Dushku (only reason to watch Tru Calling)

8. Jennifer Love Hewitt

9. Lindsay Lohan (even though she is way too into old guys)

10. Lacey Chabert (Party of Five is like a fine wine, the more the show ages, the more you appreciate it)